Photo credit: Carlos Martinez & Carlos Ruiz

We have all heard the expression, “action speaks louder than words,” but for most people they should take the expression, “think before you speak” as a motto to live by.

“Think before you speak,” should be ingrained into the minds of parents who find it necessary to call their children stupid, ugly or fat, strangers on the Internet who find the need to make obscene comments and partners who utter something uncouth at time when they felt frustrated.

Now let me break each of the aforementioned scenario down separately because each scenario has a different reason not to utter nasty things, however, they all have one reason in common and it’s plain and simple, it makes you a garbage person.

The first scenario I am going to start with is making obscene comments on the Internet because my spider senses are already tingling and letting me know that some of you are already harping about free speech and “growing a thicker skin.”

Here’s the thing, friendos, using the First Amendment as an excuse for saying something obscene, insulting or making a threat does not give you the power to say or do whatever you want, it simply makes you an asshole.

I’m pretty sure the Founding Fathers did not devise the First Amendment so men and women could be verbally sexually harassed in the physical world as well as the online world.

Instead of speaking out against the current state of our government or respecting other religions, as stated in the First Amendment, you use it to call someone a c*** or to incite someone online to kill themself.

A person should not have to change by “growing a thicker skin” to acclimate to another’s unnecessary bullshit, the one who should be changing is the one saying hurtful crap in an attempt to destroy another’s self-esteem or confidence.

Secondly, there is a difference between constructive criticism and hurtful spew, if someone makes a comment with the intent to help you learn and grow from your mistakes, then that is constructive criticism, calling someone a stupid bitch, on the other hand, is not.

Which leads me to the next scenario, parents verbally abusing their children.

Calling your child stupid, fat, ugly or a mistake is not an incentive for them to change their appearance, improve their grades or quit throwing a tantrum.

In fact, parents, this has an opposite effect, especially on developing minds.

A parent’s attitude towards their child is what defines a child’s personality and mentality.

Unfortunately, some parents do not keep that in mind when incorporating verbal abuse as a parenting tactic, and in turn, they turn their child into their spitting image, complete with the mentality that it’s okay to say hurtful things to others as well as their own kids, if they choose to have any.

Now we move onto saying dumbass things to your partner while in a relationship.

Never, under any circumstance, should you utter a nasty word or insult to your partner while in an argument.

Just because you are in disagreement at the moment does not mean that it won’t eventually blow over.

Relationships aren’t always a romp through a meadow of daisies, disagreements occur, that doesn’t mean that you should say something, while obviously frustrated, that you will regret later and quite possibly permanently damage your relationship with your partner.

However, if you are constantly arguing with your partner over nothing then time to re-evaluate that relationship and “get out of the house.”

The moral of the story is: don’t be an assbag. Don’t say hurtful or obscene things, this includes catcalling, just to inflict pain or discomfort onto others because you feel you must compensate for some lacking aspect in your life.