“I was following these adult film stars in a way where I kind of, not worship them, but was really intrigued by them, almost in a way like stan culture,” said Cream Boi, who is using an alias due to the nature of the story.

“You know you’re addicted when you’re following these stars, not only for their scenes, but for their everyday lives …Oh, they were over here on this day, oh they’re going to be at this event, at this center, on this day.”

While people can be addicted to social media, fast food and drugs, they can also develop these all-consuming obsessions for adult film stars and pornography in general.

In their case, instead of being referred to as fans or stans, they are instead, in this age of social media, referred to as “simps” or simply porn addicts.

In both cases, there is a level of attentiveness and projection of one’s own desires or fantasies that forms around the individual who is being obsessed about.

Without truly knowing these individuals, some people may put them on pedestals and/or develop unrealistic expectations for them.

Both celebrities and adult film stars may also experience a sense of dehumanization from their fans and the industries that they work in.

They can be seen by the public as a one-dimensional figure rather than a complex individual who has a life outside of the industry they work in.

This is what leads to them being objectified as they are reduced to being a commodity for people’s entertainment and consumption.

Their worth becomes their level of popularity or the amount of money they bring in or even the amount of followers they have on social media.

So although many people may idolize celebrities, form fixations around adult film stars or envy both of their lifestyles, there are also those who hold critical views on the industries and don’t necessarily admire the people who work in them or the cultures that surround them.

Cream Boi says he’s one of those people, who at a young age struggled with an obsession for adult film stars e.g., Riley Reid, but he was able to overcome his obsessions after he was enlightened.

Cream Boi got into watching pornography in the early 2010s at what he says was “an embarrassingly young age,” given how at this young age, people have questions, they’re going through puberty and being flooded with hormones.

There was also his unrestricted access and freedom to do anything he wanted on the internet.

“At that age people weren’t so aware of internet safety or monitoring kids and such, so there were no restrictions at all,” he said.

Cream Boi would become very knowledgeable on the industry and eventually wanted to learn how to get into the industry.

Not as a performer but as someone who works with the production team, “I wanted to learn how this was all made, how this was all done and like I said, the average person doesn’t really understand how…carefully calculated and how rote this whole entire process is.”

He learned how the scenes were made, what it took and not only about the effects it had on the viewers but also on the performers and how easily replaceable they were.

“It really opened my eyes,” he said. His obsession would then shift from admiring all of these adult film stars and following their every move, to pitying them.

“Instead of seeing where they are and what convention at what time, it goes from where they are after five or six years? What are they doing now? Where did they end up? How did this lifestyle affect them?”

It’s this realization of what happens behind the scenes and how it affects these individuals and the effects it has on the viewers that “broke this spell,” as Cream Boi puts it.

“I’m pretty sure once someone realizes, who is not cognitively dissonant of the entire process, that spell will be broken because at the end of the day, it’s all the quixotic fantasy of this pervert director’s vision.”

Realizing all these different things helped Cream Boi – and he believes it can also help others, who may be in a toxic stan culture and want to break out of their obsession over someone.

“People need to realize that at the end of the day these are just people, there’s no reason why we should be putting them on this pedestal just because they do something better than us.”

“They don’t know you exist, they don’t pay your taxes, they don’t put food in your mouth, they don’t put a roof over your head.”

“You know the famous saying right, at the end of the day everybody puts on their pants one leg at a time… Yeah they sing a little better, yeah they dance a little better, yeah they have intercourse a lot better, but they’re just people man, they’re no different than you and I.”